When you have a baby one of the things you may worry about is if your going to be a good mother. You ask yourself questions about disciplining and after school activities and what you would do in certain situations but those things don't happen until later. What about when the baby is brand new? Can you spoil a baby?
When I was pregnant I said that I was going to be a strict mother and I wouldn't let my baby get away with anything because who likes a kid with no manners? We both thought it would be me saying no but when I held that baby for the first time in my arms I knew all that would change. I tried my best to be serious when he threw his food on the floor but when he flashed that baby grin with all gums and only two little teeth I couldn't help but laugh. Now that my son is getting older he knows that he can get away with it a little (who am I kidding - a lot) more when Mommy is around. I am so grateful that we did sleep training early and he at least doesn't fight nap time.
Our son was about four months when we decided to sleep train in his own room and crib. He seemed more comfortable in the crib and I knew he was safer there than sleeping in bed with us. We read all the books and came up with a plan that I thought would work. After four months of not being able to sleep a full night and all the changes my body was going through, it felt like I was in the twilight zone. I was cranky, exhausted and delirious.He didn't sleep through the night just yet but having him in our room was not working and I needed to sleep through the night as much as he did. Every little sound he made woke me up and when it was too quiet I woke up to make sure he was still breathing. The first night we "trained" him, it was so hard for me. Daddy kept telling me to leave him alone and let him cry for ten minutes before checking in on him. I stared at the monitor with the little screen and saw him squirm and cry. I went in after five minutes because it was torture to hear my baby boy cry like that. I knew he was tired and he wasn't hungry or wet so I couldn't pick him up, I had to let him cry it out. I rubbed his back, said I love you until he calmed down a little and then left for another five minutes. Wouldn't you know, he cried for five more minutes but then went right to sleep. We were both so relieved. Now that I knew we could do it, letting him cry for five to ten minutes didn't seem like a big deal. It got easier the next time but it still was really difficult to hear him cry.
My husband said we were spoiling him but all the books I read said that it is impossible to spoil a baby at that age. As he got older and smarter he knew that being in his crib meant it was sleep time and he would eventually just play or babble until he fell asleep. I am now grateful we sleep trained early because I hear some horror stories now about mothers who have to rock and hold their baby even for naps and I wonder how they ever get anything done. I do sometimes wish that my baby would like to sleep with me in bed but that is my own selfish wish of having him to cuddle with and the best thing for him is to be able to relax alone and fall asleep on his own.
